Sunday, October 13, 2013

Dear Heartbreak

I am convinced it is better this way; you and I in what they tag now as an LDR.

Some partings are not so easy. When I saw you off at the bus station, I knew it would be long before you'd come back. Somehow, there was a little sigh of relief on my part. Yes, I got used to having you around but I have life to run after. You left the way you came - via that bus station. I welcomed you with open arms, and I let you go without holding you back.

I know you so well. That makes it even harder to get you off my mind. I have memorized your anatomy. I know you too much I can complete a puzzle of your body parts. I know your scent from afar. I could tell you by your shadow. But it is more than your looks that is hard to forget. You have created imprints of caution and surrender in my heart.

On occasions when you visited me, I allowed myself to get lost in your embrace. It felt like you have carved a space in your chest for my head to rest. Most times, that felt more convenient than facing the uncertain. You held on to me like you were feeding on my energy and I spent most nights holding your hand. I knew it was hard for you to leave me. It was harder for me to let you go.

Sometimes, when you were away, just like now, I remind myself of the time we were together. I read my notes about you. I unearth the poems I wrote when I was with you. I listen to the songs that got us through long nights of waiting for the sun to come out and warm us up. I  bask under the moon and tell myself you are never far away. You never are.

I cannot count the ways you surprised me. I remember that one time you serenaded me on the phone. And that time you wrote me a poem. I am reminded of the many times you'd come up with an argument and kiss me when you know you are winning. And how can I not forget the time when I was living in another city and you surprised me and brought me home. Since then, I got used to you showing up at random times and places.

I have a funny feeling you are just around the corner, waiting to surprise me. And that, dear, is the reason why I am writing you. So let me get to that. Let me start with with this: You have changed me in many ways. You were a great teacher, a constant companion and the reason for most of my poems. But something happened while you were away that surpassed everything that I enjoyed when I was with you.

No flashy entrances, no fireworks in the night sky, and definitely no music played along. Someone came and quietly erased the memory of that night at the bus station. We have no special Sundays just plain, peaceful Everydays. No sweet words, just truth .No promises of tomorrows just joys of the present. And, no more nights of constant waiting - he shows up right on time.

Some partings are not so easy but it is easier now that you are already not here.

Dear Heartbreak, let's break up.

Love found me when what I was expecting was you.


p.s. Say Hi to Barry Manilow for me. And just in case you'd come by, save yourself and walk away.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Be Honest

If there is one thing that is precious in a relationship, in all kinds of relationships, it would be honesty.

I will let Jason Mraz sing it for me.